Relationship Reflection

When a person says the word “relationship” the assumption is that they are talking about a man and a woman. However, relationship is a bond, interconnection, or a kinship that you hold with any other person or even pet. My relationships that I hold dear to my heart are those with my husband, children, family, and friends. These relationships are important to me because I rely on them in as many ways as they rely on me. In these relationships we support, respect, and love one another unconditionally and through good times and bad. Relationships between these people keep my head lifted high when I am having a good day and they know me well enough to recognize when I need to be cheered up or just have a shoulder to cry on. Above all else the relationships that I have with my husband, family, and friends are the reasons I wake in the morning and strive to be a better person every day.

My husband and I have a very close relationship. We have struggled through tough adversities and come out the other side when most couples would have probably thrown in the towel. He and I stand by each other no matter what the situation may be. We are partners in life and in parenthood and we share the responsibilities of raising our four beautiful children. We might not always get along, but that makes us stronger to recognize our differences, know when to apologize, and then remember to move on and not hold a grudge. We know each other well enough to know when the other one either needs extra attention or just time to themselves. Our relationship can be challenged by the many different diversities that life can bring to the table, but in the end we know that together is the only way to overcome them.

My children and I have a relationship that only a mother can understand. Even though children love their parents unconditionally, it is still a one sided relationship at times because they are not old enough to appreciate the relationship and what it stands for. The respect that children find for the relationships with their parents usually does not come until they become adults, or even parents themselves. The bond that a mother has with their child is something from a story book. I take long moments to just sit back and watch my children and I am in awe of them. I cannot believe how full they have made my heart and how much I want to do with myself in order to provide a good life for them. I want to be a positive role model in their life and I want to make sure that when they do become parents they can look back and be proud of the mother that I was to them.

I have many friends, but two of these friends are very close to me now. These relationships are relatively new as well. I had close friends growing up and unfortunately as an adult you learn that when your lifestyle changes, your friends might not hang around for that change. The thing about these two friends that I have now is that I was willing to confide in them when I needed help and guidance and they took me in with no judgment. I was facing rather trying time in my life and I did not know if I could trust them, but I put myself out there and I will always be glad that I did. Stacey and Alison are two people that I would do anything for, they are like my family. They have been by my side when no one else wanted to be and never once hesitating to be there. That is an example of a true friendship. Even if we do not talk for a few days we can call each other and pick right back up where we were. For example, last Sunday I needed desperately to separate myself from life and just take a break for a minute. I called Stacey up and she said I am on my way. And then in ten minutes she was at my door picking me up just so we could go somewhere for me to whine and vent.

Developing relationships can be challenging when you are not willing to take chances and trust other people. Being open with others is how to form a relationship and also how we maintain that relationship as well. We need to be great communicators when it comes to our relationships. People are not capable of reading minds, even in our best relationships, we might know something is wrong but the other person has to open up and share what is on their mind. When this communication exists it makes it possible to help one another and also to strengthen the bond that the relationship holds. I have had relationships that have grown in opposite directions, but from my point of view if those people ever wanted to have the relationship grow back together again I would be more than willing  to communicate.

There are characteristics that maintain a relationship and there are also characteristics that make a relationship a partnership as well. My husband and I sometimes good or bad have brutal honesty with each other. I am able to tell him when I need him, he is able to tell me when he has just had enough, and we are able to relate to each other as a man and woman and also as parents. We work together in life and on a daily basis to keep the house running and the kids on the right track to success in their future. Besides honesty I feel compromise is another characteristic that works well in our relationship in order to make it a partnership. If I cook dinner tonight then you have to do homework with the kids, or I will feed the baby if you give the other kids a bath, these are just some examples of our compromises on a daily basis. And there are days where either he or I might feel burned out and the other will pick up the slack. For example, I had surgery not long ago and my husband took care of me, the kids, and the house. He did the best he could to make sure I was rested and the house was close to my standards.

My knowledge of working and non-working relationships will help me become a better communicator, active and reflective contributor, and positive role model for the children that I work with. I would even hope that my colleagues would take note to the open communication lines that I display. Children need to see that honest and active communication is how positive relationships are formed. Even when we think that they are not watching they are soaking in all of the activity in their surrounding environments. If I talk to a colleague disrespectfully, children will witness it and question whether that is appropriate or not and in turn whether it is vital to have a positive relationship or not. We as educators and parents need to role model for the children positive relationships and how we handle diversity and work through adversities.